Everywhere I go someone’s tryin’ to be my girlfriend’s best
friendI’m tryin’ to pretend I’m relaxed but I’m playin’
castanets with my kneesI try to be cool and give her spaceBut a
guy’s always there ready to jump right up and take my
placeEveryone in this room seems to want to make a big fool out
of me.Everybody open you’re mouthEverybody just say ahhhhh (ah
ahh ahh ahhhhh)Everything will be all rightIf you play
alongEverywhere I go there’s someone in a trench coat staring at
meWhen I’m not at home I’m sure someone’s rummaging through my
trashWhatever could they want from meIs it just a part of a
giant government conspiracy?I gotta go see my doctor about this
itchy pentagram-shaped rash.Everybody open you’re mouthEverybody
just say ahhhhh (ah ahh ahh ahhhhh)Everything will be all
rightThis won’t hurt at allEverybody get in lineEverybody turn
and cough (cooouuuggghhh)Everything will be all rightIf you just
lay offDictate a memo to myselfTry to find if I’m the only one in
complete healthConsult contemporaries if there’s some to seeThere
really isn’t anyone who’s in my leagueEvery night at elaine’s
someone thinks they have to find beyond meI try to take three
deep breaths as I lock and arm my mini-vanEveryone says I’m
looking greatBut it’s hard to stand-up let alone to try to
concentrateI wish that everyone that I knew hadn’t sold out to
the manEverybody open you’re mouthEverybody just say ahhhhh (ah
ahh ahh ahhhhh)Everything will be all rightThis won’t hurt at
allEverybody get in lineEverybody turn and cough
(cooouuuggghhh)Everything will be all rightIf you just
layEverything will be all rightIf you just layEverything will be
all rightIf you just lay off
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